Translating What Men Say

The Man Translator: (What he says and what he means)

1. I really get into talking about my feelings...I'll talk about feelings if it gets me into your pants.
2. I go out with my buddies at least once a week...I'm dating other women.
3. I'm not looking for a serious relationship right now...wanna do it?
4. I still really value you as a friend...I still want you for booty calls.
5. My career has always been my top priority...I have a 2" penis.
6. The sexiest thing about you is your mind...You're not that attractive, but I'll still sleep with you.
7. This is so special. Let's keep it between us...I'd be totally humiliated if anyone knew we were dating.
8. She has nothing to do with us...I don't even think about you when I sleep with her.
9. My pager is the best way to reach me...I'm married.
10. I think we should slow things down for a while...Oh shit, I think I'm falling in love.
11. I don't believe in sex before marriage...I think I'm gay but humor me for a few months, ok?